One of my Toxins... LETTING GO (part 1)

Let's talk about letting go. I have a hard time grasping the reason-season-lifetime concept. I DO NOT like to lose people, whether it is due to death, a breakup or grow a apart-up. I struggle and fight (in my mind) against what’s supposed to be innate to keep people in my life.

Sorry for this random thought: I’ve never had a big mac (can u believe that)

Anyway, the people that I have in my life are very important to me and I believe they serve a specific purpose. In addition to that, I think they are supposed to stay with me (one way or another) so we can travel our journeys together. So, I have a hard time dealing with death. Ten years ago, I lost someone very important to me, my little brother. Needless to say, I’ve done a pretty good job coping with that, but it all connects to my problem with understanding that people may be temporary in my life. Either for a Reason, Season or Lifetime. There's a poem written about it and I’ll share the poem with you here:

People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.

When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.

When someone is in your life for a REASON,

it is usually to meet a need

you have expressed outwardly or inwardly.

They have come to assist you through a difficulty,

to provide you with guidance and support,

to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually.

They may seem like a godsend, and they are.

They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrong doing on your part

or at an inconvenient time,

this person will say or do something

to bring the relationship to an end.

Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.

Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand.

What we must realize is that our need has been met,

our desire fulfilled; their work is done.

The prayer you sent up has been answered

and it is now time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON,

it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn.

They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.

They may teach you something you have never done.

They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.

Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;

those things you must build upon

in order to have a solid emotional foundation.

Your job is to accept the lesson,

love the person/people (anyway);

and put what you have learned to use in all

other relationships and areas of your life.

It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

~Author Unknown

It sounds nice and simple right? Beautiful to read and as you read it, the head is nodding; a smile may come across the face, yea? But still. Still, there is that push and pull effect for people to stay when they’re not supposed to. For instance, I had a close girlfriend who decided she wanted to disappear without any warning. For months, I tried to contact her, I contacted her family and I put a lot of energy into finding her. Eventually, I did the shoulder shrug and LET IT GO.

Now, Turtle (my brother) will stay with me for a lifetime, no matter where he is, forever embedded in my mind and heart. And even other people who’ve touched my life in an extraordinary way. I remember each person for what they were to me. All the special relationships and loving friendships. Although they’re gone, they’re still apart of me and have an impact on me. I mean, the beautiful thing is, just because a person is not physically available or tangible, doesn’t mean they’re not very much alive in mind and heart. And to me, that’s the important thing. So, if I could just LET GO when necessary. Or if I could just recognize when it is time to LET GO.

Unnecessarily holding on to people (who are supposed to go) can create blockages and create mental and emotional ruckus. Letting go will present clarity. But with all that said; today, yesterday and even right now, I still can’t completely let go. I CAN. Just not now, not yet. I’m working on it though.

Toodles.

StacI